Top Reasons Why You're Still Single

Bad Attitudes, Fears, and Being Too Picky

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Reasons You're Still Single - StockXChange
Reasons You're Still Single - StockXChange
Wondering why you haven't met the one? Perhaps it's your attitude, fears, or excessive need to be loved that is getting in your way.

If you’re single and looking for the right person, perhaps you need a change of attitude. This is especially true if you have a history of failed relationships and you’re not sure why things went astray. Here are a few reasons why you may still be single. Fear not, however, all of these can be remedied.

You Have a Bad Attitude

Regardless of how many times your heart has been broken (or beaten, or stomped on!) you can’t let it come across when you meet new people. Negativity is an instant turnoff. Besides that, all daters out there can tell you their sad stories if they wanted to. You may feel as if there is nothing good to look forward to when it comes to love, but you cannot show that side to someone you’ve just met.

Put it in perspective, if you’re in a crowded room of people, do you gravitate toward the one who is laughing and having a great time or the one complaining loudly about all her problems? In order to catch someone’s attraction, you have to show him or her what a fun date you’ll be. When you go out with someone a few times, then you can talk more about your more negative experiences.

You are Afraid of Online Dating

Online dating is one of the best ways to meet someone new right now. It offers up the widest number (and variety) of people, thereby introducing you to folks you wouldn’t have met through your everyday travels. The world of Internet dating has been proven to work so rather than think of it as a last resort, get some solid information about what works and give it a try.

You Have Unresolved Issues from a Previous Relationship

Allow some time after the end of a relationship to fully recover before moving on to someone new. Too often daters will jump into the dating scene too quickly, without allowing time for all the lessons you learned in the previous partnership to come through. Take several months off from dating to give yourself some perspective.

You’re Needy

If you want an instant relationship with every single person you meet, you will across too emotionally needy and turn people off. It’s hard when you’re feeling lonely, but take comfort in the knowledge that you will find love eventually. Until then, take your time getting to know new people. Not everyone is worthy of having you in their life. Don’t settle for just “anybody” when you can have somebody special.

You’re too Picky

Relationships are as much about feeling as they are about thinking. But if you analyze every detail of your date’s idiosyncrasies, you will miss out on whether he or she is truly right for you. The perfect person for you doesn’t come with a checklist.

While it’s great to have an idea of what type of person you’d like to meet, don’t use it as a way to “weed out” people you think aren’t right. Get to know them over time, even if it’s just a few dates, before you make up your mind. You might be surprised at how you feel about someone you didn’t think you’d ever be with! That’s part of the fun of falling in love.

If you’re alone right now, keep your mind (and options) open. Don’t get restless because you haven’t met the right person yet. Instead, take a look at your approach and determine key areas of your approach that you can work on to change things. The smallest of changes in attitude and action often net the biggest results.

Cherie Burbach, C.Burbach

Cherie Burbach - Cherie Burbach writes about dating, relationships, health, sports, and lifestyle. She's the author of eleven books and ebooks.

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Comments

Jul 1, 2009 8:09 PM
Guest :
I'm sorry, but I have a right to be picky with who I want to be with. I have seen too many people that I know "settle" for someone, only to be disappointed later on. It's best to know what you want. It's almost like going on several job interviews - you have to know if you are right for the job, and if the job is right for you! LADIES, BE PICKY AND ALSO PATIENT! It takes time to find the man you're blessed to be with!
Oct 12, 2009 10:31 PM
Guest :
I AGREE, I'M PICKY BUT WATCH OUT FOR THE MARRIED ONES.
Jan 22, 2010 12:21 PM
Guest :
Though I agree that being too picky can be a turn-off, ladies
need to have some standards for what they look for in a partner.
Otherwise, they will, (and often), attract a few weirdo's and/or
abusers. I know this from personal experience.
Jan 22, 2010 12:28 PM
Guest :
I used to just "settle" for whoever was interested in me ( I am a
little overweight). I regret it because not only were certain of my
life ruined (ex. credit record) I missed out on many opportunities
as a result. All I am saying, is it is better to have some standards
of what you are looking for in a partner. Otherwise, you will get
hurt.
Feb 10, 2011 4:51 AM
Guest :
Great article!!!
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