Teenage dating abuse is at an all-time high. According to the California Coalition Against Sexual Assault (CALCASA), “between 1993 and 1999, 22% of all homicides against females ages 16-19 were committed by an intimate partner.” CALCASA also reported that half of all the reported date rapes occurred among teenagers.
Dating Violence Help For Teens
To help teens who are experiencing dating abuse, the National Domestic Violence Hotline and Liz Claiborne Inc. joined forces to launch Loveisrespect in February 2007. Loveisrespect identified the technologies that teens and young adults use most to communicate: the phone and Internet. With that in mind, Loveisrespect has a toll free hotline, interactive website, and staff of trained advocates to assist teens identify and stand up to relationship brutality. When teens lack family support or are afraid to approach their parents for help, Loveisrespect provides an outlet for confidential assistance. Teens can receive guidance via a one-on-one private chat room or by calling in anonymously to the Loveisrespect hotline.
Signs of Abusive Behavior
In order to stop violent behavior, teens first need to recognize the signs that they are in an abusive relationship. Loveisrespect offers a list of questions on their website for teens to ponder. Among them:
Does your boyfriend/girlfriend:
- Look at you or act in ways that scare you?
- Act jealous or possessive?
- Put you down or criticize you?
- Try to control where you go, what you wear or what you do?
- Text or IM you excessively?
A positive answer to even one of these questions may constitute dating violence. Young women, it seems, are especially at risk. The U.S. Department of Justice reports that females “ages 16-24 are more vulnerable to intimate partner violence than any other age group – at a rate almost triple the national average.” But while the majority of relationship aggression is directed at young women, it is crucial to reach both the sexes in order to bring total awareness of the problem.
Teen Dating Bill of Rights
With that in mind, Loveisrespect created a “Teen Dating Bill of Rights and Pledge” on their website for teens and young adults to sign. It states:
I have the right:
- To always be treated with respect.
- To be in a healthy relationship
- To not be hurt physically or emotionally.
- To refuse sex or affection at anytime.
- To have friends and activities apart from my boyfriend or girlfriend.
- To end a relationship.
I pledge to:
- Always treat my boyfriend or girlfriend with respect.
- Never hurt my boyfriend or girlfriend physically, verbally, or emotionally.
- Respect my girlfriend's or boyfriend's decisions concerning sex and affection.
- Not be controlling or manipulative in my relationship.
- Accept responsibility for myself and my actions.
Resources:
- Bureau of Justice Statistics Press Release, “Violence Rates Among Intimate Partners Differ Greatly According to Age,” 10/29/01
- California Coalition Against Sexual Assault (CALCASA) 2002 Report: Research on Rape and Violence
- Loveisrespect organization
- U.S. Department of Justice, Bureau of Justice Statistics, Special Report: Intimate Partner Violence and Age of Victim, 1993-99 (Oct. 2001, rev. 11/28/01)
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